- By James Stevenson -
Relationship goals. Picture perfect couples smiling happily on Instagram... Deep connection, strong passion for each other, a vibe of truly enjoying each others company...
If you're looking for love these pictures may stir that desire in you even more... they may even drive you a bit nutty!
Beautiful people and beautiful pictures aside... you can give yourself some really important qualities to help your search by creating a goal. Here are 3 things you can do.
Ok maybe this isn't exactly what Ghandi famously said... But you get the gist!
What are your goals when it comes to love? People are often searching for the 'perfect' partner in the same way they might search for the perfect strawberry cheesecake. Certainly I'm not saying there's anything wrong with that!
Unfortunately, we don't simply attract what we want (oh man, I wish we did). Rather, we get kind of "get what we are" or we get what deep down we think we deserve is closer to the truth. Of course even who we are is changing all the time.
It may not be the quickest but pretty much every wise person I come across says the surest way to way to find a partner and create a wonderful relationship is to focus on what you bring to the table. When you change, your whole world changes, which naturally includes your relationships.
This doesn't mean you shouldn't set specific goals for the kind of person you want to be with and the kind of relationship you want to have. The two are connected.
Once you have decided the kind of person you want to be with... you can start taking actions both towards becoming even more of that person yourself, as well as practical actions to meet the person.
You may make a decision "I won't allow any person to treat me badly ever again no matter what". Or if your last partner was cruel you may promise to yourself "I will never say cruel and hurtful things about another person ever again". You can take these intentions that are close to your heart and turn them into concrete goals. For example:
"In the next two weeks, If anyone treats me badly I will stand up for myself and say "I refuse to be treated this way" without saying anything cruel about the person."
It's common sense that some of the best relationship goals are small changes in behaviour that lead towards your ideal.
Who ever said dreaming and aiming is a bad thing?
This funny old world changes when we are aiming for something.
You can create a list of relationship goals your partner will have. Perhaps a list of 10-20 or so qualities so you are really encouraged to think in detail.
The list can go on and on and on as far as your imagination takes you.
You may think, "come on?! Does such a person even exist?". Certainly they do.
If you strive in your own unique way to become like the person you want to be with, while remaining completely true to yourself and who you are, you will in time attract people that fit your list.
Many thanks to the kind people who let me use their wonderful art work
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